Monday, June 22, 2009

My Adversary

Two months ago, Saturday morning, I found myself in bed feeling drowsy and lazy. I thought I was just sleepy but it was almost 9 in the morning. I needed to get up because my kids were already up and they wanted breakfast. Two more weeks, my husband was leaving for deployment and I already settled up my goals for the time he's gone. My plans were going to school full time, staying with my part time job and will have lots of fun with my 2 kids. Suddenly that day, he was teasing me about having a baby while he's gone. I thought to myself, not a bad idea at all, but wait, I can't have another child until I'm done with school. I told him million times that I will finish school first before another baby.
However, my feelings that day didn't change. In fact, it got worst. I was hungry, I mean not just hungry but I was starving to death. I already ate all the left overs in the fridge. So, I stopped and said to myself that maybe I am pregnant. I went to the store and grabbed the cheapest pregnancy test that they have in that store. I went home and ta-dah------ the test was positive. I was about to faint. I really didn't know if I was going to laugh or cry. Sadly to say, I was scared instead of excited. To tell you the truth, I wasn't prepared for another baby because one, my husband was leaving me in about 2 weeks for a year and having 2 children without him already scares me and financially, we don't have a budget for another baby. Also, I am in the middle of my schooling and I didn't want to ruin my plans. Besides I am having fun with my studies.

So, that was two months ago, that was me, a selfish, self-centered human being. Because of what I did, I lost my baby that until now, I just can't forgive myself on loosing my little angel. People said there is a purpose on why this thing happened and yes, they are right. I need an adversary to put my feet back on the ground.

This was Max. I lost him June 16, 2009. I was low on progesterone level that was why I lost him.

This is me now, lonely as I ever could be. I am hoping to recover soon because the world is waiting on me. There are many things on my list that I need to finish.

And these 2 kids are my biggest helpers. They make my day better while their daddy is away from us. They make me see the hands of God through their eyes and their smiles.

I am grateful that families can be together forever that someday I will get chance to see my unborn child (named Max) and to be with him forever, and I am grateful for my adversaries.
Good bye, Max.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

My Creation Version 1 (CAKES)

I love cake and one of my favorite things to do is to bake a cake. I love cake because of its taste (yummy!!!) and its design. Here are some pictures that I made for the past 1 year and a half.

But before anything else, here are some pictures of my cakes and cup cakes that are not to be eaten. It looks good in the outside but not in the inside and it doesn't taste good (Yuck!!!). Anyway, I love to decorate and two of my favorites are sewing and making diaper cakes for baby showers. I think diaper cakes are cool and special. Yeah....

1. I made this for my daughter's friend, Erin. She loves to play pretend and one of them is cooking. I gave these 2 pieces of art on her birthday together with an apron that I also made.

2. This iss my daughter's. I used it as a center piece on her 2nd birthday.

3. This is a diaper cake for my friend Emily. She had a girl named Alice.

4. Gail's baby shower. She had a twin boy.

5. To my boss, Laura who also had a boy.

6. Finally, this diaper cake was for Katie (my husband's friend). I think wrapping the diapers with tissue papers are way better than my other diaper cakes.

These are my real cup cakes and cakes:
1. My favorite color is blue and this cup cake is one of my favorite.

2. My mother-in-law was attending a wedding reception and she needed to bring brownies. Instead of just regular brownies, I made it into cup cakes and decorated the top within an hour. I didn't know how I did it but I was amazed. She thought it would be funny to have brownies turned into cup cakes but the wedding couple loved my cup cakes esp the bride. She said that the bride had frozen 3 of the cup cakes and eat it them on their 1st anniversary.

3. I wanted to have an awesome halloween last year and since the kids love marshmallows, I turned the marshmallows into ghost.

4. My mother-in-law was turning 55 last year. My husband and I sponsored her birthday party and we came up with a Luau Theme. Through my husband's help, we made these cool cup cakes for her. I baked the cakes and my husband decorated it. Instead of me doing it, I let him decorated the cup cakes or else the party would not be as fun as we had planned.

5. This is my very 1st cake. It looks funny. It was a rush when I made this and I wasn't prepared.

6. A friend of the family made a Mexican meal for my husband and I really appreciated what she did. She didn't want me to pay her so I made this cake for her daughter who was having a birthday.

7. Aunt Marguerite had her birthday and they asked me to make her a cake.

8. My in-laws had an Easter dinner with grand dad and my mother-in-law asked me to bake a cake. I saw this decoration at, and oh yeah, it came out also as a birthday cake for my mother-in-law's brother.

9. My best -est fan in the universe is my family. They make me happy and they are my great inspiration. So, this cake is for them.

10. I was curious about ganache.

11. This is JK's 4th birthday cake. I usually buy cakes for birthdays but then I got tired of buying cakes because of too much icing and they're very very sweet. To me, home-made cakes are the best!

12. This is Naybi's 1st birthday cake and is covered with fondant. Fondant is fun to play (like clay) and to use as a decoration but the taste, hhhmmm....

Hope you'll enjoy my lovely cakes!!!!!

Next, version 2:
The very mysterious creation of sewing machine and hand sewing.